


Our Galaxy

by AphroditesLaw



Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Fantasy, Clarke having insane cravings, F/F, Fluff and Crack, Hormones, Lexa being overprotective, Lexa can also manipulate emotions, Magic, Mood Swings, Pregnant Clarke, and give orgasms from a distance, and having zero chill despite appearances, it's very practical, space
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-09-21
Updated: 2018-11-04
Packaged: 2019-07-15 08:40:26
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 17,093
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16059524
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AphroditesLaw/pseuds/AphroditesLaw
Summary: Clarke saves her mother’s life by accepting the original terms of the contract Abby once made with a magical being: to give away her first-born. Years later, Clarke is pregnant from a one night-stand and the magical being in charge of her case, Lexa, comes to oversee the pregnancy. To Lexa’s dismay, she finds that hell hath no fury like a pregnant Clarke scorned…Inspired by the many "witch makes a deal for your firstborn but ends up falling in love with you" prompts.





	1. Chapter 1

Abby paced the living room floor with her hands cupped around her belly. It was just ten seconds to midnight. In ten seconds it would officially be her estimated due date, yet she felt nothing but panic and trepidation. As she stared out the window she had cracked open on this winter night, needing the cold to keep her focused, she couldn't help but notice the bright stars in the sky. And, worryingly, she wondered if the woman whose arrival she was dreading was traveling from those very stars.

Twenty years ago, Abby had promised to give away her firstborn in exchange for good fortune in life. It sounded preposterous, said like this, but it was indeed a dark truth she had never been able to forget. It was at merely twenty-years-old that an aunt, seeing Abby's potential, had discreetly told her of a way to achieve the professional success she'd dreamed of. Days later, Abby had been given a strange stone and a scrap of paper with a single word on it:

_Anya._

Anya, Anya, Anya, whispered three times in the dead of night while holding the precious stone summoned the very woman herself. She presented herself as a Traveler, a being with special abilities and from places in the universe that no one on earth could even begin to imagine. Abby had taken some time to get over the shock, for Anya looked like any other human on earth but emanated a powerful and dangerous aura. Abby felt the way moths must: fatally attracted to the flame that would kill them.

However confusing Anya's existence was, she spoke simply and was quick to the point: good fortune in exchange for Abby's firstborn. Abby would succeed in her studies, succeed in the medical field, and be guaranteed the professional and personal accomplishments she yearned for. All she had to do was give over the first child she bore. And what a deal that was, for someone who'd never understood the appeal of screaming children and sticky hands grabbing her hair…

Abby had eagerly agreed to it. Children were simply not in her plans, so there would be no sacrifice at all. Anya had left shortly after, leaving Abby with a weightless piece of paper detailing their agreement. Abby resolved to keep it locked in a safe with the precious stone, so certain that she would never need to retrieve it one day.

Success was a mild way of describing Abigail Griffin's life. In twenty years time, she became an internationally acclaimed neurosurgeon, a published author, and the wife of a brilliant environmental engineer. Though Abby wanted to believe that she had achieved it all on her own, she knew Anya had been the wind in her sails. She had always gotten every opportunity she sought; never lost out on a job; never been denied a raise. It was eerie, sometimes.

The late pregnancy had taken her and Jake by surprise. They'd always agreed they didn't need children, and yet, once confronted with the reality… Abby had felt her heart grow in size and her hands rest on her flat stomach affectionately. All at once, the debt she had forgotten came rushing back. The fear of losing her baby grew day after day, so much so that she became frazzled and Jake insisted she take time off earlier than planned.

Her poor, naïve husband… she thought. He didn't know the kind of woman he had married. A woman who could… _sell_ her child for opportunities. If the guilt didn't swallow her whole, it would be the shame in her heart that would kill her.

But as her belly grew bigger, so did her resolve to protect her child.

Her little girl, she soon learned.

A pure and innocent being that she had promised to someone else… a woman she knew nothing about, a woman who had the power to drag her child through unspeakable horrors. Who exactly was Anya? What did she _do_ with the children she collected like objects? It made Abby sick, but above all it made her furious.

Furious at herself.

Furious at the aunt who had told her about this ugly business.

Furious at––

"Anya," she breathed out, her body stilling as the woman herself appeared in her living room.

She had not changed one bit: still dressed in the same impeccable uniform, still peering at her with eyes that reflected wisdom far beyond the age she presented herself as. She had seemed so much older to Abby the first time they'd met, but now Abby could see she didn't look a day over thirty. Abby knew she herself had changed a lot in the past twenty years -- gone were her youthful traits and selfish naïveté, replaced by the steel of a mother who would do anything to protect her child.

Her plea was cut short when she noticed a little girl clutching Anya's leg and peering at her curiously. She looked no older than four, with big green eyes that roved all over the penthouse. Her hair was so thick that it had to be pinned back in dozens of thin braids, but the unusual style somehow suited her. She looked well taken care of, with rosy cheeks and wearing what looked like glittery nail polish.

Anya pressed a gentle hand against the girl's back and motioned for her to leave the adults to their business.

"Don't touch anything," she warned the girl, sounding very much like a weary parent who knew their child would touch _everything._

As expected, the girl shot off into the kitchen like a missile. She opened the fridge and peered inside, gasping in wonder each time she touched a fruit or odd-looking vegetable.

"You have done well for yourself," Anya told Abby.

Abby steeled herself. There was no time to waste with chitchat.

"You're not taking my daughter," she said in a trembling voice. "I was young –– too young to make such a heavy decision, and surely you should've known that. I accept my part in the deal, but please… _please_ don't take my child away from me."

Anya folded her arms beneath her chest, betraying no emotion at all. Abby swallowed thickly, feeling on the verge of breaking down.

"I'll renounce everything I've worked for if I must. I'll move to another country so that I'm forced to start from scratch. Please, Anya, there must be a way I can keep her."

Anya looked at her for a long moment. "Hm. You really do want this child," she remarked.

"I do. _I do_ ," Abby nodded. "More than anything I've ever wanted in this world."

"Well, as you can see, I already have a child in my custody," Anya said. "Truthfully, I've got no time for another one and was going to place yours in someone else's care. Fortunately for you, the process is tiresome and I feel lenient today."

Abby held her breath.

"However, a deal is a deal. You have been enjoying your good fortune for twenty years now, yet I will gain nothing in return for my services," Anya pointed out unhappily. "Thus, I will take from your daughter what you owed me."

"Take from my daughter?" Abby repeated, feeling her heart skip a beat. She wanted this woman _far away_ from her daughter as possible.

"Yes. It will be _her_ firstborn that you must give up."

Abby suddenly saw red. "No!" She roared. "What kind of sick business are you running here?! Ripping children from their mother's arms! Doing God knows what with them!"

Anya gave Abby a harsh glare. "When my offer benefited you, you had little qualms about my business. Now it is sick to you. I find it interesting how your moral compass changes based on what suits you best."

"I won't sacrifice my daughter's happiness because of my stupidity," Abby snapped. "And I certainly won't doom her to my fate."

"You have grown attached to her during your pregnancy, and that was my mistake. But that is the alternative to the debt you owe–"

"I reject it!" Abby exclaimed. "There must be another way."

It was then that they heard a shriek of laughter from the little girl in the kitchen. She was absolutely giddy; eyes crinkled in sheer amusement as she pressed the various buttons of an espresso machine and watched coffee pour out of the nozzle. If Abby thought she saw something resembling fondness on Anya's face, it disappeared in a flash.

"There is another way," Anya said more quietly, immediately back to business. "The only one that can undo our agreement and leave your daughter free of debt."

Abby felt a surge of hope. "What is it?"

"Your death. A life given for a life owed."

Abby inhaled sharply as a cold dread seized her body. But as her hands settled protectively on her belly again, she knew it was a choice she would make a thousand times over if it meant her child's freedom to be happy. Yet… the thought of parting without being ensured of her wellbeing was too harrowing.

"Twenty years," she murmured.

Anya raised a brow in question.

"Give me twenty years by my daughter's side. Two decades to love her, protect her, and prepare her for the world. Twenty more years of the good fortune you dealt me, and then my life is yours."

Anya seemed to examine every angle of the request in her mind. Then, she nodded.

"You've caught me in a good mood. So long as I get the life I'm owed, it's of no importance to me how long it takes."

Abby let out a shaky breath. "You agree?"

Anya snapped her fingers, causing a silvery sparkle that fizzled on the ground.

"Our agreement has now been revised. Enjoy your twenty years, Abby. The next time you see one of my kind, your time on earth will have come to an end." Her gaze turned to the living room and her voice softened the slightest bit. "Lexa, we are leaving."

Lexa, who had been flicking a lamp switch repeatedly, gave Anya a toothy grin before scurrying back to her side. She took Anya's hand and stood very still. Then, her eyes flickered to Abby's belly, and Abby felt her daughter give a kick. The purest expression of awe washed over Lexa's face, and for a moment Abby wondered if Lexa was seeing the very life now kicking inside her womb.

The pair was gone in a flash, leaving no trace of their passage. Abby crumpled onto herself, clutching her belly in great relief. When she felt another kick, she pressed her palm over the spot and let out a sob.

"My baby. My Clarke," she whimpered. "You're safe now."

* * *

* * *

* * *

Clarke was in deep shit.

She'd lost her purse and of course her mom had left the house, most likely called in for an emergency. Sprawled on the snowy front lawn of their suburban house, still feeling drunk from her friend's secret Christmas party, Clarke stared at the stars wishing for one to crash on her face.

She'd had better nights.

In her defense, pre-med had been kicking her ass for over a year now, and it wasn't the two-week Christmas vacation with her mom that would magically change things. The truth was, Clarke felt less like herself every day, and maybe it was karma that some drunk student stole her purse the same day she screamed at her mother to go fuck herself.

The mere thought made Clarke groan in shame. Her mom had done everything for her. Given her everything she needed. Been her rock when her dad had passed from a sudden heart attack. She'd given, and given, and made sure Clarke knew how much she loved her. It was Clarke who had chosen pre-med to make her proud. Clarke who had chosen the same path her mother had.

And yet… today she'd blamed her mother for her unhappiness, and the pain on her face still haunted her.

Clarke got up with a heavy sigh, feeling like her lungs were starting to freeze over. She walked around the house and wondered if she could climb up the frozen oak tree to her bedroom, but of course the window was closed and Clarke didn't think breaking in would fly over very well.

It was then that her sluggish brain remembered: her mother's office! Sure enough, as her eyes skipped over to the next room, she found that the slider window was ever so slightly cracked open. Her mother had the horrible habit of opening windows in the winter, claiming she liked the cold because it made her focus better.

Well, the quirk would finally pay off. Clarke grinned to herself before blowing hot air into her hands and starting her climb up the tree. It was awfully slippery, but Clarke had been climbing it since they moved here, fourteen years ago now, and knew every branch like the back of her hand.

Stepping from her room's tiny ledge to the office's was tricky, but booze was a fine motivator tonight. With frozen fingers, Clarke managed to pry open the office window and finally crawl inside with a loud "oof!" when she fell on the floor.

She closed the window shut with a grunt, shaking off the snow caked in her hair and on her coat. Now enveloped in silence, she looked around the room she had so rarely been inside of. Her mother's desk was as cluttered as ever with piles of papers, books, and student finals she had just started to grade. Because being a top neurosurgeon had not been enough for the great Dr. Griffin, she'd had to take up teaching as well.

Clarke admired her mother, truly, but sometimes it felt like she was trying to cram a lifetime in a month.

Her musings were cut short when a glowing light caught her attention. It came from inside the wall safe, which was unusually open. For as long as she could remember, Clarke had never been able to figure out what her mom kept in the safe. She'd never even seen her open it, yet it was now wide open and allowing something inside to emanate a startling amount of light.

Attracted to it like a moth to a flame, Clarke approached it and opened the safe wider. The glowing suddenly stopped, and all Clarke saw inside was a piece of paper next to a stone.

She picked it up and found the piece of paper to have a very odd and weightless feel to it. Like holding air. Perhaps Clarke was drunker than she thought. But if that was the case at all, the first few words written on the paper sobered her up instantly. As Clarke scanned over the five paragraphs, her frown grew deeper and deeper. The words were crisp and simple, yet utterly terrifying.

_…Based on changes to earlier agreement…_

_…In twenty years time…_

_…Abigail Griffin agrees to her death…_

_…A life given for a life owed…_

There were clauses and professional jargon that made Clarke's head spin, but from what she understood her mother had made a deal with "Traveler Anya" to die on Clarke's twentieth birthday.

 _Tomorrow_ , Clarke realized with dread.

Quickly turning the page over, she found in small print a way to contact Anya herself. It said to pick up the stone and whisper her name three times.

Well then.

Surely, this was all a bad joke.

A Halloween prank her mother had forgotten all about.

Because there was _no way_ …

And yet, Clarke felt the sudden urge to pick up the stone. She inhaled slowly and took it in her palm, staring at it a good minute as if it would crack open and reveal a genie.

When it grew warmer and glowed, Clarke's heart started pounding. She couldn't explain how she simply knew that this was real. It was like a gut feeling; an instinct awakening for the first time.

"Okay. Okay," she repeated, praying that she wasn't about to unleash the bubonic plague on the world. "Here goes nothing." She clutched the stone as tightly as she could and finally whispered the name:

"Anya, Anya, Anya."

The stone glowed more fiercely this time, nearly blinding her, and it started to feel so hot in her palm that she had to fight the urge to throw it away.

In a flash of silvery light, a woman now stood before her. Clarke let out a scream of surprise and dropped the stone immediately, backing away against the office door. The woman wore what looked like a uniform, black with silvery details on the shoulders. Her hair was a complex network of braids and Clarke briefly wondered who in the hell had the time to braid their hair so intricately these days.

Suddenly, Clarke felt a wave of calm take over her body. The same intuition as before told her that it was the woman who was somehow messing with her feelings.

"S-stop that," she stuttered.

The woman frowned. "I'm only suppressing your shock and your fear. They're stifling and very unpleasant."

"Maybe so," Clarke answered with a hard swallow, "but they're my feelings and I'd like to… feel them, thank you."

The woman sighed and nodded. Clarke felt the knot in her stomach and the pounding of her heart return, but the feelings were fading in a way that felt much more natural than the bizarre… artificial calm this woman had sent her way.

"Are you Anya?" She asked, unsure.

The woman shook her head. "My name is Lexa. I respond to Anya's calls now. It's a part of my training."

"Oh. Okay." Remembering what had started all this, Clarke allowed her anger to take over. "Well, Lexa, can you tell me who the hell Anya is and what the fuck _this_ is?" She demanded, brandishing the piece of paper while shaking like a leaf.

Lexa barely glanced it. "That is the deal your mother made with Anya. She and I are a part of a people called Travelers. We often make deals such as this one here on earth."

It sounded rehearsed, like a canned speech, and it only made Clarke more confused.

"This says my mother will die on my twentieth birthday! That's tomorrow!" She exclaimed.

Lexa blinked as if she didn't understand the problem. "Yes."

Clarke frowned angrily. "I've already lost my father, I'm not losing my mother."

"Well, that isn’t up to you."

"It says the earlier agreement was changed. What was the earlier agreement?"

Lexa scratched her temple, remembering the specificities of the agreement she had once learned about. "In exchange for a lifetime of good fortune, you mother agreed to give her firstborn away. However, when the time came, she could not bear to part with you and requested to keep you. She became upset when Anya suggested you fulfill the terms later on instead. Thankfully, Anya was in a very good mood that day -- I think because we'd just had a great lunch in the Polis Galaxy. She agreed to your mother's request to have twenty years by your side… in exchange for her own life. A life given for a life owed."

Clarke took a few minutes to process it all. "So… based on Anya's suggestion, my mother could live if I gave you my firstborn?"

Lexa's lips parted in thought. "I… suppose so."

"You _suppose_?" Clarke scoffed.

Lexa frowned, miffed that Clarke mocked her hesitation. "It's unprecedented and I would have to speak with Anya."

Clarke huffed, though her thoughts were a muddled mess. The solution was already presented to her, but she had very little time to think about it. Then again, she'd always claimed she never wanted kids; had no interest in being a mother at all. Even her young cousins were shrieking little brats in her eyes. And her mom was worth more than something that didn't even exist. She owed her everything. Losing her wasn't an option.

"Rewrite the agreement," she urged Lexa.

"I must consult with Anya first."

"Fine, then do it," Clarke grumbled. "How long will this ta-"

Lexa disappeared in a flash of light, leaving Clarke alone for a grand total of five seconds before she was back. Only, her uniform had changed to a warmer version and she had what looked like shards of crystals in her thick mane (which seemed to have grown several inches since five seconds ago).

"Apologies for the long wait," she said, sounding breathless. "Anya was in a meeting on the Ice Brink and I had to travel through several blizzards. Not to mention the Star Collector that nearly landed on me in the Crystal Galaxy. We give out traveling licenses like candy these days."

Clarke blinked several times, utterly bemused. "No problem."

Lexa licked her now bluish lips and shook off the ice in her hair. "Anya agreed to your terms, but she was furious. There will be no more amendments going forward. If you do not honor this agreement, I'm afraid Anya has threatened to liquidate your entire bloodline."

"That's, err, fair. I promise you will have my first child."

"Very well, Clarke. You will find on the copy you hold that the terms have been changed and–"

"Wait!" Clarke exclaimed, chewing on her bottom lip. "Change it back."

Lexa's lips parted. "Please be joking, I have no desire to travel through seventeen galactic blizzards again to warn Anya you've changed your mind."

"No, no," Clarke clarified, "keep everything the same on this but give me another copy with the new terms. I don't want my mother to know about our meeting. She'll simply have to believe that you… forgot to collect her life."

Lexa frowned. "That's absurd, my people would never forget a debt."

"My mom doesn't need to know you're Ms. Smarty Pants, all right?" Clarke groaned. "Do we have a deal or not?"

Lexa pinched her nose before sighing. She snapped her fingers, causing a blue flame to wrap itself around her hand. With another flick of Lexa's fingers, Clarke found a weightless piece of paper in her hand. The words still glowed blue as she read over everything twice. It was clear and straightforward, much like Lexa.

"I have enjoyed doing business with you," Lexa stated while brushing off crystals from her shoulders. "The next time we meet, you will be with child."

"Uh. Okay."

It seemed like Lexa was just about to leave when she suddenly remembered something. "Happy birthday, Clarke."

And with that, she was gone in a snap of silvery light.

Clarke looked all around, waiting a few seconds in case Lexa came back. Then, she glanced down at the agreement she was holding and let out a shaky breath. It was all very real. She had just promised a _child_ in exchange for her mother's life.

Fortunately, she did not intend to ever have said child.


	2. Chapter 2

If autumn was once her favorite season, Clarke dreaded it more than anything else now. It wasn't because of the cold wind or the drops of icy rain that somehow always landed on her neck. It wasn't even because her lease was coming to an end and she had yet to ask the landlord if he'd hike up the rent.

It was the dinner parties. More precisely, the Griffin Thanksgiving dinner, the Christmas potluck, and her goddamn birthday -- all conspiring to remind Clarke that yet another year had passed and she had nothing to show for it. Another year where she sat and smiled while her relatives spoke about their book deals and promotions and engagements, all of which made Clarke feel like the smallest, stupidest person at the table. Another year where she repeated that, yes, she still worked as a receptionist at Wallace Art Studios, but no, she didn't have her own showing yet.

In fact, Dante Wallace didn't even know her name after three years of working for him. The man still called her Clara the rare times he actually dropped by the studios, and Clarke had to bite the insides of her cheeks to keep herself from correcting him, because this was _Dante Wallace_ , and you simply didn't speak to a billionaire and his four bodyguards unless asked a very specific question. 

So the parties and the constant reminders that her life was an embarrassment were not something Clarke was looking forward to. Of course she wanted to see her mother, to help in the kitchen and to bake the pies that were somehow the only thing she ever got right these days, but it was rarely her mother alone anymore. There was also Marcus Kane now, and as much as Clarke was relieved that her mom was allowing herself to be happy and in love, it was a hard pill to swallow. Clarke got along with Marcus well enough, though sometimes it just felt painfully obvious that they only tried for Abby's sake. 

Everything and everyone was changing, but try as she might, Clarke felt like she was running in place. The great new future she'd imagined when she'd dropped out of med school was fading faster every day. And as she stood in line at the drugstore, clutching her stupid little basket and desperate to hide what it contained, Clarke wondered if it was possible she would end up hating this season even more by the end of the day.

* * *

* * *

* * *

Lexa felt _it_ while arguing with a Courier in the Ruby Belt Eatery. After recognizing her uniform, he had crashed her breakfast to complain about getting his Traveling license revoked, which of course had escalated when Lexa had told him she was on a break. She'd been enjoying some rare treats and didn't appreciate this man's attitude or breath, and so asked the eatery to call him a ferry before she took off in a rush.

There was a pressing matter to attend to and Lexa was very, very far away.

 _It_ was a tingle in the back of her neck.

The sound of a heartbeat racing, calling for her.

Anya had taught her how to recognize the sign, should it ever occur, and now it was unmistakable. Lexa was ready for what was to come, of course, but the more galaxies she crossed, the more intense the sensation became. The tingling spread throughout her body and soon enough her own heartbeat started to match the one she was hearing. She was nervous beyond belief, but before she could think too much about it, she was entering the Milky Way.

Clarke Griffin was pregnant.

Lexa thought of how she might find her: angry at her; resigned to her fate; unbothered and ready to get their agreement over with. She wondered if Clarke's partner was a significant part of her life and felt her stomach turn at the thought. That would complicate things, as it had with Abigail and Jake. From what Anya had told her, Abby had never revealed anything about the agreement to her husband. The Griffin women certainly made some interesting choices out of love. Truthfully, Lexa had admired Clarke's resolve to save her mother. She was curious to know if Clarke had ever ended up telling Abby the truth, but she had a feeling that was unlikely. 

There were many things to do in these next few months, but first Lexa had to take care of the list Anya had communicated to her. To Lexa's dismay, settling on earth didn't just happen with the snap of one's fingers. There were various steps to be taken to blend in without suspicion. 

The first one was getting to Anya's safe deposit box at the bank.

* * *

* * *

* * *

Clarke's apartment was not the penthouse that Lexa remembered Abigail Griffin standing in, nor was it the suburban house where Clarke had promised her firstborn in exchange for Abby's life. It was much smaller than both those places, but Lexa liked it better. She'd always thought people on earth made their living arrangements too complicated. Apartments, mansions, cottages, palaces, castles, hotels, bungalows, tents… how many different places did one need to sleep in, truly? Anya had once told her that people on earth were a long and complex study that was better learned through experience. Lexa was too tired to question much of anything today, but she did intend to learn.

After sitting on the comfortable couch, Lexa unfortunately lost her battle against sleep and found herself dozing off. It was just a few minutes later that she heard the key turn in the front door lock. Though still exhausted, she stood up and folded her hands in front of her, hoping that she appeared presentable. Clarke came in holding a plastic bag and a wet purse thanks to the drizzle outside. She looked frazzled and deep in thought. 

“Hello, Clarke.”

“Ah!” Clarke jumped back with a hand over her heart. "What the-"

“I'm here because you're pregnant.”

“ _Lexa_. Fucking hell." Then, Clarke's eyes widened, "What?!”

Lexa’s eyes dropped to the plastic bag and saw that it was full of pregnancy tests.

“Oh. Should I have waited a few more minutes?”

“Yes! Oh my god. _Oh my god_.”

“My apologies."

Clarke dropped the bag and started breathing very fast as she paced the kitchen floor. "Oh god, this isn’t happening."

Lexa watched her walk back and forth repeating the same thing with a few more _no, no, noes_  here and there. It did not seem like Clarke would stop doing it anytime soon and Lexa's eyelids felt heavy with sleep again. 

"Would you mind if I took a nap in the meantime?" Lexa asked.

Clarke spun around with wide eyes. “Excuse me?”

"I was six superclusters away from earth when I heard your heartbeat pick up, so I had to rush. It was a bit draining."

"When you heard my–" Clarke shook her head, " _Never mind_. You're not staying here!"

Lexa was prepared for that reaction. “I'm afraid I must, Clarke; my presence will prevent you from forming a bond with the child. That was a mistake Anya acknowledges she made with your mother."

At Clarke’s befuddled expression, Lexa clarified: “The separation will be less painful for you this way."

“Because you care about my pain?”

“Of course," Lexa frowned. "Your emotional well-being will directly impact the child. It’s natural that I wish for the next few months to go smoothly for you.”

Lexa shifted in place, unsure why Clarke was now staring at her with her mouth agape, utterly stupefied. Surely she hadn't forgotten their agreement... Five years was not that long ago. 

“I'll take the couch," Lexa said. "It's very soft."

"No, no, no, I cannot house an alien!" Clarke suddenly exclaimed. "Have you seen the size of my apartment?"

"There's nothing to worry about; I've accordingly paid your landlord for the next few months with the money Anya left behind for us. I've also stocked your refrigerator and cupboards.”

“What?!” Clarke's voice came out high-pitched and incredulous. 

She threw the fridge door open and, sure enough, found it fuller than it had ever been. The cupboards were packed as well, crammed with healthy foods on one side and a very bizarre assortment of snacks on the other. There was a jar of pickles next to gummy bears and saltines next to cracklings.

“I learned about cravings,” Lexa explained. “I think that should cover those.”

Clarke slowly closed the cupboards and wordlessly made her way across the living room.

Lexa seemed perplexed by her lack of a response. “I can buy more if needed.”

Clarke slammed her bedroom door shut, leaving Lexa staring at it for a few seconds. “Hm. I'll buy more.”

She was about to go off when she heard the unmistakable sound of Clarke’s breath hitching and then a string of sobs leaving her body. Lexa could feel that Clarke was overwhelmed. Crying was a natural response, but it stirred something unpleasant inside Lexa.

She approached the door and focused on Clarke, sending warmth and comfort her way. Everyone liked to be comforted in moments of distress.

“Stop that!” Clarke’s scream came out muffled but no less furious. She opened the door and jabbed Lexa's shoulder with her finger. “You do not control my emotions! Not now, not ever!”

Lexa was momentarily taken aback by the storm in Clarke’s eyes. It didn't help that her face was red from crying and her chest was heaving like she was struggling to breathe in her anger.

“But I can make you feel better," Lexa argued.

"If I want to cry and panic by myself that’s my decision to make!" Clarke said. "Got it?”

Lexa did not, but decided it was best to pretend otherwise. “Yes.”

Clarke slammed the door again.

Lexa made her way to the living room and sat on the couch. It felt so unnatural to do nothing while she could distinctly feel Clarke's body shaking from the force of her cries. Trying to empty her mind, Lexa looked around the apartment more intently than she had earlier. It was just one big room somewhat divided in two by a long kitchen counter. There was some clutter, but Anya had once sent her to the pungent Dross Rock to punish her for a prank Lexa had found very clever at the time, so this was highly manageable in comparison to a trash planet crawling with the dregs of society. It was actually a bit similar to Lexa's very own unit, which made it more familiar. Lexa did miss her unit and her routine. 

Truth be told, she was a bit out of her depth. This was completely uncharted territory and nothing in her training had really prepared her for this. It was easy to _say_ she was going to ensure what had happened with Abby did not happen with Clarke, but exactly  _how_ she would prevent an emotional bond was beyond her. It was in fact a new rule Travelers were starting to implement, but they had yet to know if it worked. From what Anya had told her, the presence of the Traveler alone would be enough. Anya believed that if Abigail had had a visual reminder that the child was not hers to keep, she would have suppressed her maternal instincts. Lexa didn't really grasp the emotional politics of it all, but she trusted Anya's wisdom.

And in nine months, she would look after the child as Anya had looked after her. So went the cycle.

* * *

* * *

* * *

After a few more whimpers into her pillow, Clarke turned over to take deep, calming breaths. She wiped her nose and dried her cheeks, deciding she wouldn't shed another tear.

It wasn't even because she had forgotten about the agreement. While walking back home carrying the damn pregnancy tests, she'd actually remembered Lexa with surprising clarity. Everything came back to her in the most detailed of ways. She remembered the glowing stone, the shards of ice in Lexa's hair, their conversation, and the fateful deal she had made in exchange for her mother's life. It wasn't the first time she thought back on that moment in her life, but this time it was with a vastly different perspective. 

Back then, she'd been certain that a baby would never be in the cards. That she would have everything figured out and under control, and that her twenties would be the best time of her life. What a knucklehead she used to be.

Clarke needed to get out of her shitty apartment, but first she needed to know where exactly all of this was going. If Lexa thought she could just take over her life with vegetables and gummy bears, she was dead wrong.

Lexa was on the couch seemingly asleep when Clarke finally came out into the living room. She didn't mean to be a creep, but looking at Lexa like this made her feel... at peace. And not the phony kind of serenity that Lexa had tried to send her way. There was just something different about her. Firstly, she'd stopped emanating whatever aura she had that made her seem both incredibly captivating and incredibly dangerous. Secondly, if one ignored the uniform, she almost looked… normal. Like a young woman taking a nap instead of a space-hopping, baby-snatching alien. But Clarke reminded herself not to be fooled as soon as Lexa let out a little sigh and slowly opened her eyes. There was something indescribable in those eyes that made Clarke think of the great power Lexa could use against her. 

She decided to follow her gut and jump right in.

“What will you do with it?” She asked.

Lexa sat up looking confused by the question, or perhaps still too sleepy to process it.

"The baby," Clarke clarified. "What's going to happen to it?"

"I'm going to raise it."

Clarke frowned, surprised by the simple statement. "You are?"

“Yes. Pass down my Traveling abilities, my knowledge of the universe. It will need for nothing.”

Clarke took another step toward the couch. “What a child needs above all is love. Are you capable of love?”

Lexa frowned, seemingly offended by the question. “That's not your concern."

“You’re not staying in my apartment until I know for certain where all of this is headed," Clarke declared.

Lexa immediately rose. "You must be forgetting your agreement, Clarke. You _know_ where this is headed and there's no stopping it."

Clarke took a step closer; emboldened by the precious cargo she now knew she was carrying. Lexa wouldn't dare harm her.

"Listen to me very clearly," she said between clenched teeth. "I may not want this child, but if I find out that it's damned to a life of pain in some kind of twisted trade you run, know that I _will_ make these next nine months a living hell for you." At the widening of Lexa's eyes, Clarke stepped closer to her, forcing Lexa backward into the kitchen. "I won't let you _sleep_ , I won't let you _think_ , and not a day will pass when you don't _beg_ for a minute of quiet."

Lexa suddenly hit the kitchen table and gripped the edge for support.

"You and Anya can threaten to destroy me all you want," Clarke hissed, "and maybe you will, and maybe you'll think you've won when this kid is in your arms, but these nine months will scar you so badly that you'll live the rest of your life knowing that when you go to sleep, Clarke Griffin will be banging pots and pans in your nightmares. Understood?"

Lexa swallowed thickly. “There's no need for concern, Clarke," she said, feeling oddly flustered. "I think some explanations are in order."

At Clarke's unblinking gaze, Lexa felt the immediate need to say something else. "I'll never harm the child -- I can assure you that."

Clarke finally relaxed and smiled. "That's all I wanted to hear. Now, you and I are going to have a little chat."

She turned around and casually hoisted herself up on the kitchen counter. Lexa followed suit and sat on a kitchen chair with a good amount of space between them.

"If you're going to be my roommate," Clarke said, "there won't be any secrets between us."

Lexa nodded, seemingly glad they had moved on from threats. "I have no intention of deceiving you. Travelers are an honest people -- some would say brutally so. It's how we raise our children."

"Did Anya raise you? Is she like a mother to you?"

Lexa worried her hands on her lap, unused to answering questions about her upbringing. Travelers were honest but they did not give away personal information so readily. Clarke seemed to want some peace of mind though, and Lexa felt that it was important to give it to her. 

"I would say she's raised me like a mentor: with a great amount of tough affection."

"Is that how you plan to raise this baby? With tough affection?" Clarke asked.

Lexa considered her words carefully. "Anya gave me a happy childhood, but I was always very conscious that she didn't regard me as her child. That was her way, and I'm grateful for her lessons, but... it will not be _my_ way."

At Clarke's frown, Lexa elaborated: 

"I want to be a mother," she murmured for the first time. "I didn't have one, and perhaps it's foolish to think I could be one when I don't know the first thing about motherhood, really, but soon as Anya revealed that it would be me caring for your child, should you have one, I… I felt that it was right."

Clarke pinched the bridge of her nose. "And you people can't have drunken, unprotected sex like everyone else?"

Lexa frowned. "Travelers are barren by design. I have sex for pleasure."

Clarke felt her cheeks flush at Lexa's simple honesty. She would have to get used to it, though she was no prude herself.

"How are you not extinct?" She quickly asked.

"Well, we live for hundreds of years more than you do. One might say it balances itself out."

"What about adoption?" Clarke questioned. "What about the kids in orphanages or on the streets? You don't think maybe they could benefit more from your abilities?"

Lexa bit her lip. "There's only a very small window, right before the birth, when the child's body can assimilate the Traveling ability. I will pass it through your digits, and then you will pass it to the child. There are ways for older bodies to develop the ability on our home planet, but... a grown child can't come to Costial without already being a Traveler. Do you see the dilemma?"

Clarke didn't see or understand much, but at least it didn't seem like the kid was doomed to live with an evil witch on some weird prison planet. It made sense that a barren people would make deals for firstborns if it was the only way their kind could live on. Still, Clarke couldn't think too much about the technicalities of everything. Abilities passed through hands… traveling through galaxies… it was enough to make her dizzy.

"Costial is where you live?"

Lexa smiled fondly. "Yes, our planet in the Polis Galaxy. It's named after the first known Traveler."

"How old are you exactly?"

"In earth years? I was almost four when Anya and I visited your mother, the day you were born. That would make me 29, but we age differently. More slowly, I suppose."

"Wait, you were born on earth?" Clarke asked in surprise. 

"Yes. All Travelers are. We have found that the abilities can't be passed down otherwise."

"What about your biological mother? Are you allowed to be in contact with her?"

Lexa's head tilted to the side, trying to read Clarke.

"I'm not asking for myself," Clarke huffed, "I'm curious about the process."

"Well… biological isn't exactly the right word anymore. Parts of my biology changed when Anya passed down her Traveler's abilities. One might say I am as much Anya's as I am my birth mother's. But… yes, if she were to call for me with the stone she was given, I would not mind meeting her. From what I know, she's quite happy to be childless though."

"So when I give birth… the baby will be genetically yours as well?"

"Yes," Lexa murmured. "And it will be able to withstand the trip to Costial."

"Like getting bit by a radioactive spider and getting superpowers then."

Lexa frowned. "No, that's ludicrous."

"Never mind."

"Do you have more questions?" Lexa asked.

"Not yet." Clarke looked at Lexa up and down, examining her uniform. "But you need to get normal clothes."

"Yes, people were staring at me in the grocery store."

Clarke sighed and jumped down from the kitchen counter. She walked toward the entrance door.

"I'm going to get some fresh air."

"I'll come with you."

"No."

Lexa stopped, watching as Clarke grabbed a coat and took a deep breath.

"Look, I accept our agreement and I promise I won't try to get out of it. I don't even think I'd keep the baby if you weren’t here, but you are." Clarke put on her coat and looked around her place. "You can live here these next few months, tell me to eat my vitamins and do pregnancy yoga or whatever, but before all that… Could you please just give me the rest of this day to think?"

"Is it because you've just found out you're pregnant?"

Clarke rubbed the back of her neck. "It's because… five years ago I thought I would be in a very different position, but it turns out I'm stuck in a rut and I was stupid enough to have a one night stand with a guy whose name I don't even know. Not exactly a dream come true."

Lexa didn't know what to respond, and so watched as Clarke took her purse and left the apartment. A feeling Lexa didn't recognize settled in the pit of her stomach; a heaviness and weariness she had never felt before. Clarke was hurting, but it was not because of a torn muscle or a broken bone. Her heart was heavy with self-doubt and disappointment, and Lexa didn't know how to fix it without her abilities.

* * *

* * *

* * *

Clarke spent the afternoon in her favorite coffee shop, tucked on a narrow and quiet street. It sold the best rustic pastries and today she wouldn't deny herself the chocolate cupcake _or_ the almond croissant. John Murphy was a cranky barista, but at least he never judged her sweet tooth. They had a sort of understanding that sometimes felt like friendship, both using the other to vent about the world and the crummy people in it.

Today was too busy though, and Murphy was forced to deal with customers while Clarke sat at a table in the far corner, near the windowpane. She'd taken a sip of her coffee and spat it out, vaguely remembering that caffeine was a no-no for pregnant women. Or maybe that was a soft rule. Regardless, why anyone would want to put themselves through this was beyond Clarke. Merely thinking about the next nine months was exhausting enough. 

What was certain is that she wouldn't be able to hide this from her mom. Their relatives at parties… maybe, if she didn't balloon too quickly, but nothing went past Abby. And not being able to hide the pregnancy also meant having to explain Lexa's presence. Clarke was pretty sure that her mom wouldn't recognize Lexa over two decades after their first meeting, but she still gave out… an aura. It would be difficult to hide that, but maybe Lexa could come up with something. 

The alternative was telling Abby the truth, but Clarke knew her mom would feel terrible guilt if she learned her daughter was giving away a child for her sake. She had seen how much lighter Abby became as the years went by and no one came to collect her life. Now that she was finally in a place where she seemed to enjoy herself without constantly looking over her shoulder, Clarke couldn't take that away from her. Her agreement with Lexa had to stay a secret.

But if not the whole truth, she could... bend it a little. Say, if she was acting as a surrogate for Lexa - which she _was_ \- but Lexa was from the other side of the country... they could say they'd arranged to live together for practical reasons. Clarke would have to make up some reason for why she would ever agree to something like this, but that wouldn't be too difficult. She could always use her loans as an excuse and make up some beautiful nonsense about wanting to help a woman fulfill her dream of being a mother. As for Lexa -- well, she would have to repress her _brutal honesty_ on this one. More importantly, she'd have to face Abigail Griffin's scrutiny, and that meant coming up with an ironclad life story that didn't include Travelers or galaxies or weirdo agreements for firstborns.

All things considered... this could work. And in nine months, everything would go back to normal.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Find me at aphrodites-law on tumblr if you're so inclined :)


	3. Chapter 3

Lexa was fast asleep on the couch when Clarke came back home later that night. Clarke figured the jet-lag was probably intense, but she'd have thought a _Traveler_ would be an expert at handling that. Regardless, she decided to go about her own business as if nothing had changed.

She made herself some spaghetti with tomato sauce, ate while catching up on her social media, and listened to some light music while washing the dishes. Lexa slept through it all, and by the time Clarke was ready to go to bed herself, she was pretty sure not even a foghorn could wake her up. She wondered if Lexa dreamt at all and what those dreams might look like for someone who had seen so many galaxies.

Feeling a chill in the living room, Clarke grabbed an extra blanket and covered Lexa up to her shoulders. She didn't know if Travelers could feel cold or even fall ill, but she had no desire to find out. Something told her that living with a sniffling, sneezing Lexa would not be pleasant in the least. She switched the lights off and walked to her bedroom, closing the door with a sigh.

After changing into her pajamas, Clarke stepped into the adjoining bathroom and looked at herself in the mirror. Hesitantly, she pulled her top up and stared at her exposed stomach. She had always had curves, but now she just looked and felt bloated. What she had thought might be the result of indulging in too many pastries from the coffee shop was something else entirely -- and she still couldn't really believe it. She'd been pregnant for _five weeks_ , living her life without realizing how drastically it would change, and now her body felt just as alien as the woman happily sleeping on her couch.

This would never stop being weird.

After slipping into bed, Clarke tried to empty her mind. It had been an exhausting day and she envied Lexa for sleeping so soundly. They had yet to discuss everything in depth and Clarke was getting increasingly more anxious about her mom. There was no doubt the truth would break her heart. Her mother had started this whole mess, it was undeniable, but she had also sought to correct her mistake by sacrificing herself. Clarke couldn't even be angry at herself for interfering -- the choice was one she would make again. She would put her own heart on the line a thousand times if it kept her mother safe and happy, that was a certainty.

The next morning, after little sleep, Clarke drowsily made her way to the living room only to find it empty. She looked around for any sign of Lexa, but it seemed like she had promptly left after folding the blanket on the couch. Clarke didn't allow herself to worry, even if she knew Lexa had no knowledge of the city. She probably had some Traveling business to get to and was perfectly safe hurtling around the universe.

Having woken up much earlier than usual, Clarke still had a few hours until work and decided to treat herself to bacon and eggs, stay a bit longer in the shower, and take her time to get ready. With her hair curled and her white blazer over a light blue top, she walked back into the kitchen and stared at the snacks in the cupboard. It was tempting to take a packet of gummy bears in her purse, but Clarke felt an irrational need to stay away from anything Lexa had bought. This was _not_ a craving.

"Good morning, Clarke."

"Ah–! " Clarke jumped, clutching her heart. "Lexa!"

Lexa stood near the kitchen table with a soft smile. "I apologize."

She looked infinitely more alert than yesterday, with her cheeks a rosy hue and her eyes sparkling with energy. Her hair was in its unique braided style and there was not one strand out of place. 

"Look, you can't do that anymore," Clarke said, still feeling her heart pound. "No popping in and out of the apartment. If you're going to live on this planet, you need to use _doors_ like everyone else."

"Yes, Clarke," Lexa responded distractedly, seemingly taking in Clarke's outfit.

"And while we're at it, leave a note before you decide to disappear. Or maybe we can get you a prepaid phone. There's a lot we need to talk about and-"

Clarke's sentence trailed off as she noticed Lexa staring at her like she hadn’t heard a word she said.

"Lexa?"

Lexa blinked a few times and met Clarke's eyes. "Yes?"

"What just happened?"

"I was distracted."

Clarke looked behind her and frowned. "By what?"

"You're very beautiful," Lexa simply said, then frowned to herself. "I've no idea what I agreed to. I apologize."

Clarke felt herself fluster. "Well - I - you agreed to use doors."

"Hm."

Clarke cleared her throat, still unused to Lexa's honesty. "Okay. Well, for your information, I'm a receptionist. The good clothes and full face of makeup are a part of the job. You'd sing a different tune if you saw me straight out of bed."

Lexa didn't seem interested in agreeing, instead choosing to change the topic. "I brought coffee."

Clarke only then noticed the two crates of coffees placed on the kitchen table. There were eight cups with different markings.

"Lexa, that's -- thank you, but I have a machine."

"Yes, but I was already outside. I didn't know what you'd like, so I asked for the eight most popular choices."

Though oddly touched by Lexa trying to find her perfect drink, Clarke remembered spitting out her last coffee. She'd completely forgotten about all the rules she had yet to google.

"One cup will not harm the child, Clarke."

Clarke looked up with an arched brow. "Are you reading my feelings?"

Lexa shook her head. "Reading your face."

Clarke sighed and motioned for them to sit down. She grabbed the cup labeled as a cappuccino and found that it was the perfect temperature -- neither scalding nor tepid.

"You wanted to talk?" Lexa asked.

Clarke suddenly remembered everything they had to plan for. "Yes. We need to agree on a story we can tell people. My mother and I have a good relationship and it's inevitable that we're going to wind up seeing a lot of her in the next few months. There's going to be Thanksgiving, Christmas parties, my birthday… Hiding our situation just isn't an option."

Lexa nodded in understanding. "Do you still want to keep her in the dark?"

"Yes," Clarke firmly said. "My mom is happy and in love and… If she knew _why_ she's still here, she wouldn't be able to forgive herself. I can't have that."

"Then I will lie."

Clarke knew she must've looked surprised. She hadn’t expected Lexa to agree so quickly, especially when honesty seemed so ingrained in her.

"I dislike deceiving anyone, it's true," Lexa said, "but you're carrying my child, Clarke. I understand that it affects your life significantly. The least I can do is make it easier for you."

Clarke softened. "Thank you. I… I have a solid idea about our relationship and why we'd live together, but we still need to figure out what your story is."

"Do you mean a job?"

"Not just that. Like… where you're from, what you studied, what you've done with your life so far. Things that people on earth do on a daily basis."

"May I choose whatever I want?"

"Yes, of course. But first things first, this uniform…"

Lexa nodded. "I'm buying my wardrobe today."

"You are?" Clarke glanced at her watch and thought of something. "My workplace is right by some major clothing stores. How about I give you a quick tour of some places and then drop you off?"

Lexa seemed amused. "Clarke, I can go from one galaxy to the next without getting lost. I know there are over twenty thousand eating establishments in your city and I know their exact locations. I see the path to each store I would like to try and I could recite the names of every street on your planet. I don't need a… tour."

Clarke arched a brow. "That's all very impressive, Lexa, but do you know what _my_ favorite pizza parlor is for when I want a slice at 2am?"

Lexa opened her mouth, blinked, and then looked down. "I do not."

"So it's settled," Clarke smiled satisfactorily. 

* * *

* * *

* * *

Lexa did not like cars.

They were ugly, noisy, and coughed out a terrible amount of toxic gases. Still, she had no choice but sit rigidly in the passenger seat, glancing at Clarke's hands on the wheel every once in a while. Ships and ferries in most of the universe were autonomous and Lexa did _not_ understand why earth was so behind.

And though Clarke was going on about every shop they passed and which shortcuts she liked, Lexa could not focus on a single word. Her head was heavy and her stomach upset. She had a white-knuckle grip on her own knee and felt like her body was crumbling inside.

"You better not vomit in my car," Clarke suddenly said at a red light.

Lexa's jaw clenched. "I don't understand why it was unanimously decided to keep your planet isolated and ignorant. To leave you so behind in time with your… _manual cars_..."

Clarke rolled her eyes. "I'm sorry I don't have a flying saucer for Her Majesty. Did you hear what I said about the ice cream shop?"

Lexa shut her eyes closed when the light turned green and Clarke started down the street again.

"Seriously?" Clarke asked. "Don't you travel at light-speed or something? You can't possibly be getting motion sickness."

Lexa kept her lips tightly pressed together, causing Clarke to sigh.

"All right, just… breathe. How about we talk about your back-story?"

"That would be nice," Lexa nodded, eyes still closed.

"Okay. Full name?"

"Alexandria Traveler."

"How about something a bit less on the nose?"

"I'm sorry, Clarke, I can't think at this speed."

Clarke glanced at her speedometer showing 25 miles per hour. She bit her lip. "How about Woods? It's common enough so you can't be googled."

Lexa frowned. "Can't be-"

"No, no, definitely no time to explain that. Profession?"

Lexa cracked an eye open and remembered the back-story Clarke had told her on the way to the parking lot. "I should be well off, correct?"

Clare nodded. "Surrogacy is hardly cheap, so I think that'd be better. Did you have an idea in mind?"

"Employment on most galaxies is vastly different, but… basic necessities remain the same. To drink, eat, sleep. I've been preparing food since I was a child, out of my own interest, and the produce on earth isn’t so different. There are hundreds of thousands of restaurants in your country alone -- I think I could easily pretend to work in one of those."

"A chef," Clarke smiled. "You want to be a chef."

"Yes."

Clarke glanced at Lexa, happy they were getting somewhere more concrete. "Well look at that -- your face isn’t green anymore."

Indeed, Lexa had fully opened her eyes and relaxed her grip on her knee. "I enjoy talking with you, Clarke."

"Well that's good to know, considering we have eight more months of this."

It was nice; she had to admit it as well. Her friends were always busy lately, forging their own paths in increasingly competitive fields, and sometimes it got lonely.

As they approached the street Clarke worked on, Lexa's worry shifted into something different. Clarke saw her looking at the various stores with an unreadable expression. She wasn't so tense anymore, but certainly still out of her element.

"What's wrong?" Clarke asked.

Lexa smoothed her hands over the sleeves of her uniform. "I've never worn anything other than this. I'm not sure what I want to try."

Clarke chuckled, relieved it was just style that Lexa was worried about. "Just pick what you feel good in."

"Do you feel good in your outfit?" Lexa asked.

"This? It's kind of like my own uniform, I guess. The brand has high standards and I'm the first face that clients see, so I dress the part. It's not what I wear on weekends, but I do feel nice in it."

"Hm."

"Just ask a salesperson to help. Say you need a new wardrobe because all your stuff burned in a fire or something."

After Clarke pulled over in a parking spot, she unlocked Lexa's door and took a deep breath. "I need this to work out, Lexa."

Lexa looked over at her and softened. "It will."

Clarke nodded. "I should be back around 7pm, but I'll make a copy of the keys on my lunch break so you can have your own... just in case."

"Thank you. I will keep myself busy until then. I hope you have a good day, Clarke."

"You too."

After Lexa left the car, Clarke saw her stretch out her limbs like she had been in a cage for a decade. She smiled and started the car, driving down the street to the Wallace Art Studios. It was only when she got into her parking spot that she noticed Lexa had left behind a packet of gummy bears on her seat.

Clarke bit her lip before snatching it quickly and putting it in the pocket of her blazer. It was time for eight hours of monotonous work, but at least there was something to look forward to on her break.

* * *

* * *

* * *

It wasn't quite 7pm when Clarke made it back home. Today had been as tedious as any other day, but Clarke was admittedly curious to know how Lexa's own day had gone. She'd had a copy of the keys made and thought about their plan all afternoon, working out the details and thinking of any question her mom might ask.

It was fairly straightforward as it was: she needed the money to fully repay her loans without burdening her mother anymore, and had decided some months ago that surrogacy was a fulfilling way to do that. She could make someone happy while also getting her money's worth -- who could argue with that? Lexa and her had been put in contact through an agency and the both of them had agreed on cohabitation. Lexa lived in Seattle, but was taking a year off from work to fulfill her dreams. It was the perfect balance of cogent and schmaltzy -- enough to warm the mostly cynical hearts of the extended Griffin family.

Clarke was planning on ripping the Band-Aid early on and inviting her mother for dinner the next week, figuring that it would be easier to break the news one-on-one rather than surrounded by uncles and cousins. Deep down, Clarke knew it went deeper than that. She still felt lost and needed to see her mom. She rationalized that it was natural for a daughter to seek out her mother after news of pregnancy, at the very least for advice, but then again… It was Lexa who was the mother-to-be, not Clarke. For precisely that reason, she had to be prepared for any reaction coming from Abby, good or bad.

A knock at the door pulled Clarke from her thoughts. She opened it and found Lexa on the other side wearing an elegant black coat and carrying dozens of bags. The sight was so surprising that Clarke couldn't help but chuckle.

"You know, this is the first time you appear in front of me and I don't get a heart attack."

"Did you have a nice day?"

"Yeah, it was fine."

Lexa smiled. "May I come in?"

"Of course. Look at you all fancy."

Clarke closed the door behind them and watched as Lexa set her bags down near the couch. She had suede boots on and even a small purse dangling from her shoulder. Finally she unbuttoned her coat and took it off, revealing an outfit that Clarke had definitely not expected.

It was a suit; a dark blazer with a white blouse, tie, and fitted pants. How Lexa had left looking like a sci-fi zealot and come back looking like a businesswoman who ate men for brunch was beyond Clarke.

"Is it more appropriate?" Lexa asked her, fiddling with her sleeves. "I also have dresses for your mother's events. The salespeople were all very eager to help."

"Yeah, I'll bet." Clarke came closer and took in the little details on the blazer. Whatever amount of money Anya had left behind… Lexa had taken full advantage of. "You look sharp. It's just very Wall Street."

Lexa didn't seem to catch the reference, but the tone was enough to make her look down in doubt. It was sort of endearing.

Clarke motioned to the outfit. "May I?" She asked.

"Please."

Clarke first unbuttoned the blazer and then popped the collar of the blouse up to get rid of the tie. It was a skinny little thing that looked all sorts of wrong on Lexa, who herself seemed relieved to have it off. Clarke figured that the salespeople might've read Lexa… a bit wrong. The aura she gave off was intimidating, to say the least, but Clarke had seen this woman snore on her couch and nearly get carsick. Despite her incredible power, there was a surprisingly vulnerability and softness to her.

Still finding the outfit too rigid without the tie, Clarke undid two of the top buttons of the blouse. As her fingers brushed against Lexa's warm skin, she couldn't help but notice they'd never been this close before. It was curious how they were nearly the same height but Lexa had seemed taller to her.

She felt Lexa's eyes on her and worked up the nerve to stare back. This close, there was nothing dangerous in those green eyes anymore. Lexa was open, as honest in her demeanor as she was with her words. A part of Clarke still felt resentful for the disruption in her life, but the other part, so much stronger in this instance, was deeply curious about the world this woman came from.

"How does it feel?" She asked quietly.

Lexa waited for her to elaborate, not once looking away.

"To cross galaxies. To be able to leave your problems behind."

"My problems are a part of me…" Lexa murmured. "I'm afraid there's no galaxy I can leave them on."

Clarke tried to hide her disappointment by looking away and forcing a smile. She took a step back and cleared her throat.

"You look good."

Lexa seemed unconvinced. "Is it really so different now?"

"It's more casual." Clarke picked up Lexa's coat and went to hang it by hers near the entrance. "Not a lot of women walk around every day wearing a suit and tie, especially if they're not currently working. This is… still preppy, but it'll have to do for now. Did they show you any casual wear?"

Lexa's face immediately lit up and she turned to dig something out of a bag. Clarke couldn't imagine what would have her so excited, but she was glad that Lexa had at least had some fun today.

"I found it on a rack in the maternity section," Lexa explained as she pulled out a green sweater with a massive Rudolph on it.

Clarke's face fell.

"On Costial, we have an animal that's nearly identical," Lexa said. "Only one antler and no red nose, but still… the similarity! It's fascinating to think of how life has perpetuated itself in the universe, sometimes so dissimilar in appearance or behavior, but other times, almost like a mirror image-"

"Oh Lexa."

"I understand you only wear it around Christmas-"

"No."

"But the material -- it's very soft."

"Lexa."

Lexa swallowed back her gushing. "Yes?"

Clarke took the sweater from her and put it back in the bag. "It's okay. I forgive you."

Lexa frowned in confusion. "Forgive me? I'm not sure I…"

"You brought an Ugly Christmas Sweater in my home and then you made me look at it. It's not your fault; you don't know about our culture's worst traditions yet. But Lexa?" Clarke asked in a saccharine tone.

"Yes?" Lexa whispered.

"I don't care if I'm the size of a whale and that sweater is the only piece of fabric left on earth that will fit me," Clarke said. "I would rather gouge my eyes out than ever wear it."

"I see…" Lexa said. She had not thought to ask Clarke about her style, which she now realized was a mistake. "I'll dispose of it."

Clarke nodded before looking through Lexa's bags herself.

"I'm inviting my mom over to dinner next week. We need something you can wear and feel comfortable in."

Amongst the absurd amount of blazers, she was pleased to find jeans, dresses, long-sleeved tops, and even some pajamas. She pulled out a pair of black pants and a simple top.

"Why don't you try this together in the bathroom? And undo your braids as well."

"My braids?" Lexa asked, face paling. "I can't."

Clarke bit her lip. "I understand they're a part of you, but my mom has an incredible memory. If you've had these since you were a kid, there's no way she didn't notice."

"She was only focused on you and breaking the agreement," Lexa argued. "I doubt she even paid attention to me."

Clarke rubbed the back of her neck. "Okay, but… if she figures it out and starts screaming bloody murder, that's on you."

Lexa frowned before grabbing the clothes and muttering something unintelligible on her way to the bathroom. Clarke sat on the couch and took off her own shoes, looking around at the bags littered on the floor. How much different would her life look in another week? Another month?

Lexa came out a few minutes later and cleared her throat. Clarke turned around and found herself blinking in wonder a few times. Lexa had undone her braids and swept her hair to one side, letting the loose curls free. She wore the dark jeans and long-sleeved cotton top; a simple outfit that made her look stylish without overdoing it. For the first time, Clarke saw her as simply Lexa. She could’ve met this woman anywhere -- at work, at a party, at a bar -- and even been her friend. This woman didn't live on a distant planet or have strange abilities. She was from Seattle, had a good career, and wanted to be a mother.

If Clarke could see it, Abby would, too.

"Well?" Lexa asked.

Clarke couldn't help but say the truth. "You look beautiful."

Lexa's shoulders relaxed. "I feel much more comfortable in these clothes. Thank you, Clarke."

"Yep. I'm the surrogate extraordinaire."

Lexa's eyes flicked to her stomach and then back up. "I'll let you rest now."

"Why? Do I emit exhausted pregnant lady signals?"

Lexa smiled. "Yes."

Clarke frowned. "Do not."

"I wouldn't lie to you."

Clarke sighed and went to put her shoes in the entrance. "I guess Alexandria’s also a stickler for the truth."

Lexa's nose wrinkled.

"What's wrong?" Clarke asked.

"Perhaps… when we aren’t in your mother's presence, you could still call me Lexa."

"You don't like your fancy new name?"

"I prefer being Lexa by your side," Lexa murmured.

Clarke didn't dwell on the peculiar phrasing. It had been a day of changes for the woman standing in her living room and she could easily grant her this small request. "Lexa it is."

* * *

* * *

* * *

All things considered, cohabitation with a Traveler was just like any other roommate arrangement. A few days later, Clarke had experienced her first bout of morning sickness, though it had happened at the gallery in the middle of the afternoon. Somehow Lexa had felt it, greeting her in the evening with her hands nervously clasped in front of her. She'd cleaned the apartment, gotten rid of odd-smelling foods, and made the place smell like a damn wonderland. Clarke had felt the unease melt off her shoulders.

The week passed quickly, though Clarke found herself craving more and more sugar, which inevitably triggered prolonged nausea afterward. It was a vicious cycle and it certainly wasn't ideal, but Clarke liked to think she had a strong handle on it. It didn't hurt that Lexa seemed to know which foods were best and kept the gummy bear supply fully stocked. 

It was the following weekend that, for the first time, they saw each other just minutes after waking up. Clarke had walked out of her bedroom in her pajamas, yawning loudly and muttering something about coffee, when Lexa had been in the midst of waking up herself. Clarke had been surprised to see her, as Lexa usually woke up much earlier and went for long walks. She had apparently had her Traveling duties significantly reduced by Anya, which made her body antsy for movement.

Still half-asleep and bathed in the morning light, they quietly took each other in. There was something different about seeing a person straight out of bed. After a moment, Lexa smiled.

"Hm. You were wrong, Clarke."

"About what?"

Lexa turned around and walked to the kitchen to start the coffee machine, knowing by now how to work it without causing the nozzle to sputter pitifully. Then, she pulled out a pan, the crate of eggs, and some bacon.

Though still perplexed, Clarke took her seat at the kitchen table. Tomorrow night, Abby would finally know what her daughter had gotten herself into and everything would change. But for now, Clarke thought, she would enjoy her first Saturday in Lexa's presence.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And we have tipped into domesticity...


	4. Chapter 4

It was early Sunday morning when Clarke's nausea plucked her straight from blissful sleep and sent her running to the bathroom. She emptied whatever was left in her stomach, cursing her body for interrupting what should have been a lazy morning. Her hair fell in her face and stuck to her cheeks, but she was far too busy gripping the toilet seat to push it back. She'd need an hour-long shower anyway.

She was still hunched over the toilet when she heard a knock.

"May I come in?" Lexa asked.

"Ugh."

She heard some shuffling before Lexa spoke again. "Is that a yes?"

Feeling herself dry-heave, Clarke didn't bother formulating an answer. It was in between two deep breaths that she heard the door open and Lexa kneel behind her. After a few seconds, she felt her hair being gently pulled back and loosely braided.

"It doesn't have to be this way…" Lexa murmured.

Clarke cracked an eye open and waited.

"I can make the nausea go away."

Not caring if she looked like a human barf machine, Clarke wiped her mouth and turned around. She was hesitant to entertain the conversation, as it wasn’t the first time Lexa reminded her she had the ability to dilute her feelings.

"How would you do that… exactly?" She asked. "You wouldn’t mess with my brain or anything like that?"

Lexa shook her head. "It's as if you had an apple in your hand, and I made the apple disappear. I would do the same for your nausea each time you felt it."

"But how? And where does the apple go?"

Lexa shrugged. "It goes nowhere. It simply ceases to exist."

"And you can do that for anything?"

Lexa seemed hesitant. "For ailments, yes, but a strong illness… would take a lot of energy from me."

Clarke brought her knees to her chest. "You know, my father had a heart attack when I was in high school," she said quietly. "After you and I changed the agreement, I always wondered why my mom's good fortune didn't save him."

Lexa sat back against the wall. "We have no power over life and death, Clarke. If we did, it would not be necessary for us to make deals in the first place. Good fortune ensures that your actions will have favorable outcomes, but it does not make you immune to loss."

"Your abilities… do they get stronger as you age?"

"Yes. Anya for example is particularly impressive. She started the trend of taking on more than one agreement at the same time, which is difficult to master. Abby was her last agreement though."

"Why? What happened?"

Lexa bit her lip, perhaps unsure if it was her story to share. "A long time ago, the Traveler who made the deal with my birth mother disappeared without a trace. When my birth mother contacted her because she felt her good fortune wasn’t working, it was Anya who stepped in and took on the responsibility. She had already made the deal with Abby, by then, but also had two agreements to honor with women who didn't bear any children -- one of them in your family, in fact."

Clarke's eyes widened. "Someone else in my family?"

"Mm. She was the one to tell your mother about Anya."

"I bet it's great-aunt Pascale. She's always had suspicious amounts of good luck and my mom hates her guts."

Lexa chuckled, though she did not reveal if Clarke was right or not.

Finding that the conversation kept her distracted from her pitiful stomach, Clarke pursued it eagerly. "So... two women out of four who didn’t have kids, yet Anya still gives them good fortune. Sounds like a risky system to me."

"You might see it that way, but it's necessary if we are to keep our kind alive. Even if her power was weakened, Anya says it was worth it. After all, she did ensure the addition of two new Travelers."

"You and…"

Lexa's eyes flickered to Clarke's stomach and nodded.

Clarke felt suddenly curious. "Does that mean Anya could've raised us both?"

Lexa smiled at the thought. "No. She was going to put you in someone else's charge -- one of our elders, Indra."

"That's strange to think of."

"Yes, your life could have been very different."

"Would we have met?"

"Most likely. I'm quite close to Indra's daughter, in fact. Octavia and I went through group training together."

"What about the Traveler who made the deal with your birth mother?"

Lexa swallowed hard. "Traveler Becca. Anya suspects she got caught in the Great Veil."

At Clarke's furrowed brow, Lexa elaborated: "An expanse in the universe... and at the same time, not quite a part of the universe. It is a great nothing. There is no dust, no stars, no gas, no gravity. Time doesn't exist, and if caught within you live in suspension, unable to see yourself, to do anything but wait for death... or wonder if it will ever come at all."

"Lexa, that's… grim."

"It's all speculation. No one knows for certain what it is, but it's a Traveler's greatest fear to be caught in it."

"How would Becca have..."

Lexa shifted uncomfortably. "It calls to us, sometimes. In our sleep; during our travels. It can be a very great… pull."

"Like a magnet?" Clarke asked.

"More like… like a siren," Lexa said, eyes staring at the tiles until finally she shook her head and offered a smile. "Not to worry though, it's billions of years away from earth."

The air had gotten tense, and Clarke was desperate to cut through it. As always with this Traveling business, it was a lot to process. "Well, I bet you're happy to be in my tiny bathroom," she stated jokingly.

Lexa chuckled. "Very happy, Clarke."

Clarke looked down at her stomach and then bit her lip. "Okay… I'd like to try this again."

"Are you sure?"

"Yes, but can you go slow?"

"Of course."

It was just a few seconds of them staring at each other when Clarke gradually felt her nausea fade to nothing. Amazed at the sudden relief, she got up and touched her stomach, poking and prodding at the flesh.

"Oh wow."

Lexa got up as well. "Satisfied?"

"Lexa, that was nothing like the other times you did it."

"How do you mean?" Lexa asked with a slight frown.

"I'm not sure. I just always thought it felt a bit fake -- like I could just tell the feelings weren't mine. Does that make sense?"

Lexa seemed contemplative. "You _are_ the first person on earth I've ever used my abilities on. I might've come on too strong before."

Clarke grinned. "At least now I won't barf at dinner before we break the news to my mom."

"Yes, that will certainly work in our favor."

It was Clarke's cell phone ringing that reminded them there was indeed more to this world than a cramped bathroom where secrets could be shared. Clarke scurried out and grabbed her phone on the nightstand, frowning when she saw it was her boss calling.

* * *

* * *

* * *

"Clarke. At least let me help."

Clarke was fully dressed and in the entrance now, hurriedly wrapping her long scarf around her neck and trapping her hair in it.

"It's my workplace, Lexa. I can't just bring strangers over in the middle of a shipping disaster."

Lexa pursed her lips, watching Clarke work her feet into her boots. Why she never untied the laces first was beyond Lexa.

"It was not your mistake, yet you're the one they call to deal with it."

"Yeah, well, that's part of my duties. Just like you had to take over Anya's duties that first time we met."

Lexa shook her head. "That was my training. You have been at this place for years -- how could you still be in training?"

It wasn't asked maliciously, but Clarke felt a bolt of annoyance regardless. "Not everyone gets to bounce around galaxies. Some just have the one apartment with the same pile of bills to pay every month."

"But all your monetary needs have been taken care of."

Clarke buttoned her coat. "That's not what-  _never mind_. I just need to let those delivery guys in and make sure nothing in those crates is damaged."

"It would not be your fault if it were."

"Tell that to Cage Wallace and his uptight clients."

Lexa watched Clarke put her beanie on and shove her keys in her purse.

"How should I entertain your mother if she comes early?" Lexa asked.

Clarke snorted. "My mom is never early unless it's a life or death situation. She was even late to my graduation, so you've got nothing to worry about. Besides, I'll be back before 6. This can't possibly take the whole day."

Clarke opened the front door but stopped in the doorway, turning to Lexa with a softer expression. "There's an iPad on my nightstand if you want to Google stuff or just read some e-books."

Lexa frowned. "I didn't understand much of that sentence."

Clarke chuckled. "Okay. I'll see you later."

Lexa let out a sigh when Clarke left and closed the door behind her. She was tempted to go to Clarke's workplace regardless, but Clarke had been firm. Besides, Lexa had promised to make her life as easy as possible. If getting out of her hair did that… she could not refuse it.

* * *

* * *

* * *

The day went by quickly.

Lexa was usually very aware of the passing of time, but after picking up the iPad that Clarke had mentioned, she had fallen into some sort of time suck. It was confusing, at first, but not much more different than some of the interfaces in old ships or ferries on Costial. She could not navigate the tablet with her mind, however, which was slightly grating, but she did enjoy some of the games on it.

Much more interesting was Google. Lexa had a firmer grasp on it now, and found that it answered questions rather efficiently -- even if it still didn't tell her where Clarke's favorite pizzeria was. That was one Lexa had yet to figure out. She enjoyed reading and memorizing recipes, although after a while she realized a thousand new recipes was enough knowledge to retain. It was her searches on surrogacy that offered some concerning information, and she hoped that Clarke would hurry back so that they might discuss their plan further. Afterward, she amused herself with articles about the universe, finding most of them erroneous.  _Oh if only NASA knew..._

At 5pm, she ambled toward the kitchen with her mind deep in thought. She would make spaghetti Bolognese tonight, which Clarke had told her was a family favorite. It was easy to prepare and it would pair nicely with red wine, which Lexa had bought herself… in France… just this last Friday. Anya had restricted her Traveling significantly and Lexa had felt a bit rebellious. Not that the trip had helped make her less jittery. She needed vigorous exercise -- the kind that short trips didn't exactly satisfy. Still, Lexa was not the type to disobey strict orders.

And she did want to blend in as well as possible. After setting the table, she went into Clarke's bedroom to get her clothes for the night -- the same casual outfit Clarke had approved of one week ago. Clarke had made some room for her clothes in her closet, even though Lexa had insisted she could stash them somewhere on some deserted planet. Of course that was before Anya had messaged Lexa to stay put. In hindsight, it was nice to have such quick access to her clothes.

The only thing that Lexa couldn't get used to was keeping her hair unbraided. It felt like she had lost an essential part of herself and her proud identity as a Traveler. She felt unkempt; her morning routine significantly reduced. Clarke insisted that her hair looked good swept to the side, or even in the early mornings when it stuck out in all directions, but Lexa had her doubts. She could always feel Clarke's deep amusement, though she didn't let her know that. Clarke had gotten more used to her abilities, but she still didn't like it when Lexa pointed out what she felt before she even knew it.

It was while she tried to brush her hair to one side that she heard the front door open. Prepared to see Clarke, she walked out of the bathroom quickly.

Only, it was not Clarke whose eyes she met.

"Mrs. Griffin," Lexa said in surprise.

Abigail Griffin had clearly aged since the last time Lexa had seen her, yet it was not her appearance that Lexa felt had changed the most. Her hair, now graying, was still as long as it had been over two decades ago, and she looked healthy, but it was her aura that was unrecognizable. Once crippled with fear and shame, Abigail was now free of her burden. She was happy, Lexa felt, and what a difference that made.

"Oh hello," Abby said. 

Lexa found herself speechless, every rehearsed line gone straight out of her head at the prospect of a conversation without Clarke in the room. This was not how they had planned for this to happen.

"You're very early," she croaked.

“Yes, I… Well, I wanted to spend more time with Clarke."

"Clarke had a work emergency."

"I see... And you are?” Abby asked.

Lexa cleared her throat. “Alexandria Woods.”

"Abby. It's nice to meet you, Alexandria."

Though Abby extended her hand, it was her forearm that Lexa grasped firmly in greeting before releasing it. Abby furrowed her brow, but did not question the strange gesture any further.

“Are you a friend of Clarke’s?”

Lexa had a moment of hesitation. Was she a friend of Clarke's? They had agreed on the surrogacy scenario, and that they were living together. One might think that implied some level of trust, but friendship was a different matter altogether.

“We’re friendly, yes,” she settled on.

Abby’s eyes widened. “Oh - are you - I'm sorry. Clarke didn’t tell me she was seeing anyone.”

“Yes, we see each other every day.”

Abby seemed even more surprised. "You live together?"

Lexa nodded and then readied herself to explain their situation.

“Well, that’s - lovely," Abby said, though still clearly caught off guard. "How long have you been...?”

Finally, Lexa remembered her lines with more ease. “We met eight months ago. There was an immediate connection and I felt that she was the perfect choice. In fact, I-”

Abby's eyes widened. “Eight months?” She repeated, sitting down at the kitchen table. “I apologize; this is a lot to take in. Clarke is usually so open about her dating life. Don't get me wrong, I know she's bisexual, she's just never told me about... well, your relationship."

Lexa froze as she realized what Abby had come to believe.

“I suppose this dinner was her way to break the news?" Abby asked with an awkward chuckle. "She does have a knack for waiting until the last minute to announce big changes in her life."

"Mrs. Griffin-"

"Oh I don't mean to sound disapproving," Abby quickly said, noticing Lexa's discomfort. "Why don't we just start over? I'd love to get to know you, Alexandria. And please, call me Abby."

Lexa felt her palms start to sweat. Clarke was going to be very, _very_ upset.

“Abby, I’m afraid there’s a misunderstanding."

It was of course then that the entrance door opened and Clarke hurried inside, her cheeks and the tip of her nose slightly red from the cold. She quickly took off her boots and coat before turning toward the kitchen. The sight of her mother made her jolt.

"Mom! You're early!"

Abby stood up to embrace her. "Hi, honey. I just wanted to surprise you for once."

Clarke quickly glanced at Lexa before smiling back at her mother. "No, that's okay, I just got caught up at the studio. There was a big shipping mistake and then doing inventory took up all my time."

"That's all right. Alexandria and I were just getting to know each other."

Clarke's eyes slid to Lexa again, who was standing as rigid as a plank. Abby took her daughter's hands and motioned for them to sit down.

"Honey, why didn't you tell me sooner?" She asked. "This is wonderful news."

Clarke blinked a few times in surprise. "Oh… she - she told you? And you're okay with it?"

“Yes, _of course_. I don't know why you felt the need to hide this for eight months." Abby said, then chuckled. "Though I know how much of a whirlwind new beginnings can be."

Clarke nodded, feeling so relieved the news was finally out. And her mom was taking it so well! "Honestly, everything just happened so fast. After we met we just knew it was a fit, you know?"

Lexa quickly grabbed the bottle of wine on the counter. "Some wine, Abby?"

"Oh sure. Thank you, Alexandria."

Lexa poured her a glass and set it on the table. "It's a Bordeaux. From France."

"Honey, you're not drinking?" Abby asked Clarke.

Clarke shook her head. "You know I ca-"

"Why don't we talk about France?" Lexa exclaimed.

Abby and Clarke frowned at her in confusion.

"Alexandria, just sit down," Clarke told her, then smiled at Abby again. "I'm really glad you're here, mom."

Abby squeezed her hand. "I wish we could've done this sooner." She looked between Clarke and Lexa and took a sip of her wine. "Well come on then, I want to hear the full story."

"Uh, well, it was pretty routine," Clarke started with a small shrug. "There was a lot of talking and figuring things out -- how we were going to do this together; what our expectations were."

"How's the wine, Abby?" Lexa interrupted.

"Hm? Oh it's delicious. Clarke, you were saying?"

Lexa tried to catch Clarke's eyes in vain.

"Right, so finally we decided to jump right in," Clarke continued. "Next thing I know, Alexandria and I are at the clinic and _bang!_ I've got an embryo in my uterus,” she chuckled.

Abby spat out her wine.

Lexa buried her face in her hands. 

“A _what?!_ ” Abby choked out.

Clarke’s face fell as she registered her mother's shock. Her heart sank in her stomach and she slowly turned to Lexa, who was peeking at her through her fingers. 

“You… _didn’t_ … tell her?” Clarke asked between clenched teeth. 

Lexa swallowed hard and then forced a smile. “I hadn’t gotten to the baby part yet... darling.”

“You’re having a child after eight months of dating?!” Abby spluttered.

Clarke's body froze. "Eight months of-"

As she realized the depth of the damage, anger started boiling inside her. She got up and bit on the insides of her cheeks to keep herself from exploding.

“Mom," she started with a barely controlled expression, "I get that this is very confusing, and I'm going to explain everything, but first I need to talk with Alexandria.” She scowled at Lexa. “Bedroom. _Now_.”

She marched to her room and heard the click of the door as Lexa closed it behind them. Lexa felt Clarke's icy glare before she even turned around to look at her.

“I understand that you’re very angry," she said.

“What clued you in?!”

Lexa cleared her throat. “For one, your nostrils are flaring-“

“Shut up! Oh my god, Lexa!” Clarke hissed. “What the fuck happened? Why does she think we’re _together?_ ”

Lexa joined her hands in front of her. “I believe that she came to that conclusion on her own. By the time I understood, it was difficult to correct her. Not to mention your barging in. And I tried to talk about France.”

"Oh, my bad!" Clarke exclaimed. "You tried to talk about France! Because everyone knows that's a signal to shut the fuck up!"

Clarke kneeled on the bed and buried her face in the pillow to scream.

Lexa bit her lip. “It's salvageable.”

“How!” Clarke exclaimed.

At Lexa's guilty expression, Clarke finally understood.

“No, no, _no_ , we are not playing happy family!”

“Is it not more plausible than surrogacy, Clarke?” Lexa rationalized as she walked toward the bed. “This afternoon I was googling on your iPad, and did you know that most surrogates have had children themselves? In fact, at your age, and in your present living situation, it's not likely you would have been chosen as a candidate.”

Clarke groaned into the pillow again. Lexa felt at a loss, unsure of how to fix this.

“I’m sorry. It's my mistake.”

A few seconds passed before Clarke sat up and took a deep breath. 

“No. You didn't do anything wrong," she said, and then smiled bitterly. "I knew the plan was farfetched."

"But it was one of the smartest plans, given the situation," Lexa said, sitting on the bed next to Clarke. 

She looked at Clarke's hands on her lap and hesitated before she covered one with her own. Clarke seemed surprised by the touch, but didn't pull away.

"I'm going to make sure this works, Clarke. I promise you that."

Clarke felt a lump in her throat, terrified by the turn of events. They were so close to hurting her mother, yet she trusted Lexa that they might pull this off, at least for now. 

* * *

* * *

* * *

For her part, Lexa worked hard to keep her promise, but Abby was not exactly an easy woman to appease. Clarke had gone silent a few minutes ago, watching as her mother and Lexa argued back and forth. It was sort of riveting, a bit like an endless tennis set. 

"I just don't understand," Abby said for the tenth time. “Clarke, you said you were having money issues with your loans and now -- do you realize how much a child costs?“

“Clarke and I have established a strong financial plan," Lexa fired back. "We are ready to welcome this child into our lives.”

"Ready? For goodness' sake, do you realize how time-consuming raising a child is?" 

"We're both responsible adults, mom," Clarke sighed, though it was hardly useful. Abby had focused all her ire toward Lexa.

"Yes, this certainly screams responsible," Abby huffed. "No offense, Alexandria, but unless you're a chef at the Royal 35, I can't possibly see how you're financially set to welcome a child."

"Jesus Christ, there's more to it than money," Clarke snapped.

"You're right, Clarke," Abby said. "A child needs constant attention. So tell me, who's going to care for it when you're dealing with emergencies on Sundays and Alexandria is in her kitchen until late at night?"

Lexa frowned, something like anger in her eyes now. "Mrs. Griffin, weren't you already a surgeon when you had Clarke? And yet you managed."

"I was 40 years old, with my own apartment, a solid marriage, and a shared stable income," Abby sneered. "There's no possible comparison."

"And that was your way," Lexa stated, "but this is ours."

Clarke tried to find her mother's eyes. "Mom. We're having this baby, okay? This isn’t me asking for your opinion or your blessing. This is…" she looked down at her stomach and felt the same realization come to her: "The baby's already here. So it's happening, whether you approve or not."

Abby shook her head. "I'm sorry, Clarke, but I can't sit here and pretend everything is all right when you've just made a monumental decision with a practical stranger. I just can't. Your father and I waited years to have you and-"

Clarke chuckled bitterly. "Let's not pretend I was your fucking miracle baby. I know I was an accident in your perfect little life."

It was a blow that everyone in the room felt, even Lexa who had not realized Clarke could hold so much venom.

Abby smiled tightly before getting up. "I think it's best if we postpone this dinner for now."

Clarke followed her to the door. "Mom…"

"I'll call you. I just need some time to think. But I love you, Clarke. I do."

She barely glanced at Lexa before grabbing her coat and leaving the apartment.

Clarke stared at the door until Lexa saw her frame shake, a sign that she was crying, at first some choked whimpers before they devolved into cries.

"Oh Clarke…"

She walked to her and pressed a hand against her back in comfort, but Clarke suddenly turned around and buried her face in her neck, clinging tightly to her as she cried. Lexa did not know what to do, but comfort had to be given and so she wrapped her arms around Clarke and waited until her cries subsided.

Finally, Clarke pulled back. "I'm sorry. I made such a mess," she whispered, uselessly wiping the wet stains on Lexa's top. 

"Clarke... your mother just needs time. The plan will work."

Clarke wiped her eyes before walking toward the couch. She sat on it and pulled her legs up to her chest. “Yeah. It'll work. Up until the point you and the kid disappear and I’m left scrambling for an explanation.” She looked up at Lexa with watery eyes. “When there’s no trace of my girlfriend or our baby right after I push it out, you don't think she'll put two and two together?”

Lexa took a seat next to her.

“She likely will, but the deal will be done. I will be gone, never to bother you again. You can both put this behind you.”

“You don’t understand..." Clarke said with a shake of her head. "Once she figures it out, she’ll be crushed. There’s no going back to normal now. It’s a train wreck waiting to happen.”

“But you did this to save her life...” Lexa said.

“Yeah, which is exactly what will eat her up.”

“What I'm saying is that I understand your pain, but your mother made a deal of her own volition. She was presented an opportunity and she sought it out. It was not forced upon her. Anya did not come to her without being summoned. I’m sorry, but perhaps it's necessary for your mother to shoulder some of the responsibility. You are here _because_ of her decision. Why should she not share the burden?”

“No, I’m here because I drank too much and made a mistake.”

Lexa chose her next words carefully. “Clarke… if you truly don't want to carry this child, I won't stop you."

When she understood Lexa's meaning, Clarke felt herself deflate. "No, that's not what I want. I thought about it, I can't lie, but I want you to have it." She looked up at her and smiled gently. "You’re going to be a good mother, Lexa. I can tell. This kid is going to have its pockets crammed with snacks every day. Besides, I want this agreement to be over for good."

“If it's Anya's wrath you fear, I can assure you she will not touch you. Or your family."

“Really? You’d fight your mentor for me?”

“I vowed to make your life easier, and I will.”

“Lexa, this is very different from what we agreed on. I mean, a relationship... We have so much more to figure out. Do Travelers even date?”

“Of course. Costial encourages romantic and sexual fulfillment. We are a very affectionate people.” Clarke seemed surprised, which spurred Lexa on. “Traveling can be isolating. After training is complete, it is highly encouraged to find your equal.”

“Your equal?”

“The person whose hand you hold on your travels.”

“That’s nice.” Clarke hesitated. “Do you have a someone?”

Lexa shook her head. “There was a girl I thought I might ask once, but I found her in her unit with someone else.”

“Lexa, that’s awful. I’m sorry.”

“It was a long time ago, and it would have been a mistake," Lexa said with a shrug. "I was interested in immediate pleasure over delayed benefits,” Lexa chuckled at her own expense. “Our relationship burned very fast, but I didn't know any better. She’s a very chaotic Traveler now -- always risking shortcuts through black holes. Truly reprehensible.”

“I guess relationship drama is the same everywhere.”

“I suppose.”

"And what about Anya? Does she have an equal?"

Lexa sighed. "Anya doesn't believe in equals."

"Oh. So how did you end up believing in them?"

Lexa hummed, as if she'd expected the question. "Something... happened to me, some time ago. I couldn't really explain it, but it changed the way I felt things. My entire perception of life shifted, and I… I just knew, within me, no matter how many times Anya grumped about it, that I would not always Travel alone."

Clarke shifted closer and bumped Lexa's shoulder with hers. "Well, I hope your equal can sit tight for eight more months, because you're stuck here playing house."

Lexa smiled softly. "Patience is a Traveler's greatest trait, Clarke."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yes... it's the fake dating trope.


End file.
